Broody? Me? Maybe a little.
Can someone please reassure me that broodiness goes away?! I don’t know why, but all I am thinking at the moment is “baby” “baby” “baby” and it’s driving me round the bend.
There are so many reasons as to why I can’t have another yet…But my other half thinks I am just trying to reason mentally with myself so I override my heart.
Let me explain a little about why I can’t have, or don’t want (I don’t actually believe this statement), another baby.
For starters, I have two gorgeous children – a girl and a boy – who are 20 months apart in age. Some might say I have the “perfect” family. This is a phrase that really grates on me and has done since I found out I was having Ethan. Why is it “perfect” to have one of each? Anyway, I chose to have a close age gap so they would hopefully have a great bond, and they do. They love each other dearly and play together all the time. Would another child feel pushed out? Would the bigger age gap cause issues? Plus, my mum is a non identical twin which is apparently meant to increase my chances of having twins and that WOULD be an issue!
Then there is the house and work situation. We live in a two bed house and are mortgaged up to our eyeballs. With the current housing situation, it’s highly likely that we are in negative equity. So there is no chance of a move to a bigger house – the only thing we can do is extend in the future, but again this is more money that at the minute we just simply do not have.
Throw into the mix that I work full time. Our parents have the children and we feel it would be unfair for them to have three children at once. That said, Kayleigh would be at pre-school five afternoons a week and by the time I returned to work after a third, she is likely to be in full-time education. See? I’m convincing myself it would work!
I don’t have any baby stuff anymore. I sold it or gave it away as I wasn’t planning on having anymore, so that’s another expense we’d incur if we had another that we just cannot afford to pay out.
Plus, a BIG issue…my other half doesn’t want another. But he could become work in progress if I switched on my charm to change his mind!
All in all, I can think of a dozen logical reasons why not to have another baby. Some are probably more valid than others. So why can I not stop thinking about it? I must be mad to even consider going back to the baby stage. I loved it when Ethan started sleeping through and stopped using bottles etc, but I can’t stop thinking about it. My broodiness is not being helped with the Christmas period coming up and loads of cute outfits, great gifts and gorgeous new buggies coming out. Plus, I loved being pregnant – every part of it.
I was so adamant I would never have another baby, now I’m just confused! Please tell me it stops at some point and I just have to ride the storm to get out the other side?